Have you ever applied a set of principles you learned in one aspect of your life to another, only to find that it’s a game-changer? That’s how I felt when I chatted with Prospology‘s Mental Health Expert, Bernard Chen LMFT this afternoon. Our conversation involved actively redefining business, prompting us to reassess our approaches.
The more we talked business, the more parallels we started to draw between dating and entrepreneurship. Here are our top 5 practical insights for you to apply in your business (or dating life—whichever is being neglected most!):
1. Rediscover Your Passion.
When pursuing any business or relationship, we can’t lose sight of why we started it in the first place. That initial passion and drive that first led us to embarking on this new venture is a critical determinant of continued success.
As I’m sure you’ve experienced, the spark of excitement when we first start dating someone can soon wear off. Daily life and responsibilities get in the way, which can easily overshadow our initial passion. Whereas, date nights, thoughtful gestures, and special surprises can re-ignite said passion and get us back on track with our loved ones. The same is true in business.
The question we posed was: “How do I make myself more important to me?” What often starts out as an exciting opportunity to explore a deep passion, idea, or product professionally, can too often become a daily grind of day-to-day operations and stressors. Finding a way to re-discover our passion can give us a newfound appreciation for our work, reigniting our creativity and motivation to succeed.
In my case, after redefining business using this lens, I decided to start engaging more directly with Prospology students again and creating more heartfelt content. My business is a way to connect deeply with others and help them reach their potential, as well as a productive and meaningful way for me to express myself openly. I’m feeling re-motivated already!
2. Self-Love Drives All.
Understanding that both dating and entrepreneurship require a strong sense of self-love and self-worth resulted in us redefining business. The more we can recognize our own value and focus on personal growth, the healthier our relationships and the more successful our businesses become.
On the dating side, we must love ourselves first and foremost because it:
- Makes us more attractive to others when we feel good about ourselves,
- Helps us set and maintain healthy boundaries with our partner, and
- Reduces the likelihood that we’ll become overly dependent on others.
And in entrepreneurship, self-love gives us confidence in our own abilities, showing up as:
- More resilience when we face inevitable setbacks and failures,
- A greater ability to take necessary risks and pursue ambitious goals, and
- Effective leadership, as we’re more likely to inspire and motivate our Team.
In my case, I’ve been experiencing writer’s block for my memoir for quite some time. We chalked it up to a lack of self-love, as I said: “I’ve been avoiding writing my book because it’s painful, but I want to tell my story, and I want it to be heard.” Writing is a cathartic process for me. So by procrastinating on my book, I’m not giving myself the love I deserve. Something to work on!
3. Authenticity is Key.
In both dating and entrepreneurship, authenticity is crucial. If someone gets to know a certain version of you, or gets sold on a brand that isn’t a true reflection of what you have to offer, you’re in big trouble. Trust must be earned.
With respect to dating, you can’t hide behind a mask or pretend to be someone you’re not—it’s a recipe for disaster. Over-photoshopping your dating profile pics or hiding the fact that you actually eat meat is never going to end well. Whereas, couples who communicate clearly and directly are much more likely to stand the test of time. The same goes for couples who allow one another to grow together, rather than apart.
This is also true in business. Customers need to trust a brand in order to buy, so brands who are authentic in their marketing efforts will always come out on top. Not only that, business owners who operate with integrity are considerably better leaders, innovators, and problem-solvers. Why? Authenticity sparks creativity.
Bernard Chen LMFT and I discussed the fact that you can’t force someone to love you. “Desire is non-negotiable,” he said. Someone is either romantically interested or they aren’t. A customer is either interested in your product or service or they aren’t. Trying to coerce someone will only end in tears. We must respect others’ boundaries, allow for connections to form naturally, and form sustainable alliances based on mutual interests and values in order to succeed in both areas.
As a result, I decided to focus my efforts on content marketing, attracting the “right” students organically, rather than proactively by exhibiting at conferences. Putting myself in front of people as a sponsor wasn’t feeling great, but putting out content that I feel passionately about is a different story entirely. I’m excited!
4. Deep Connections Matter.
We all know the difference between a deep emotional connection with a partner or spouse versus a surface level “situationship”. Similarly, customers should connect with the person behind the business—not just the product or service.
In intimate relationships, we must share our thoughts, feelings, and vulnerabilities with our partner in order to bond and stand the test of time. We create shared experiences to strengthen the emotional connection between one another, as well as offer empathy and support to nurture our relationship. These factors are all conducive to a long-term commitment based on trust and mutual respect.
Entrepreneurship isn’t so different. When we understand our customers’ needs on a deeper level, we can provide tailored solutions, leading to customer loyalty and repeat business. We can more easily provide opportunities for our Team members to grow when we have a deep understanding of their talents, skills, and interests. And, we can extract more valuable insights from mentors who we’re personally connected to; especially those who share values with us and truly resonate with our company’s mission.
One thing I said that got us onto this topic was: “I always want to have some level of connection with our students on what they’re experiencing and what they need.” Bringing me back to my initial drive to build Prospology (helping people succeed in business and create freedom-focused lifestyles they love) has been a real eye-opener in that respect, as it’s given me something tangible to focus on in the coming months.
TLDR:
When we focus on connecting with those who resonate with our true selves, we end up on a path to redefining and evolving both our relationships and business. (Thanks, Bernard Chen LMFT!)
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